Too Late...

I have always said this to myself, "damn! too late! I should have done it earlier!"

I have not been very good in grabbing onto chances that I had, and always regret after they are gone. One good example, I had weeks to buy souvenirs for family and friends back in Malaysia, I just thought I still have time, and now I freaking out the last few days.

Yes, that's me. I like to procrastinate; I don't know to act when there's chance, well, and I am afraid to act. Always, when I am ready and have the gut, it's too late. And thinking there is nothing I can do, it's just painful. Well, probably there is something I can do, but I am just afraid of taking an extra step.

I am not a brave man, I must admit. I am afraid of failure. That's why I am only good at my expertise, and a total failure at what I am not good at, or at least what I think I am not good at.

Man, I totally don't know what I am doing right now. My brain tells me, "no! it's wrong", and my heart tells me "go!"... So, I make it as cool as possible, untraceable and unnoticeable, hoping to fulfill both "go!" and "no!". But, I know, not a natural actor as I am, it doesn't work that way. And sometimes makes me wonder, "why do you want to hide it in the first place?"

It's getting worse recently. I have no control over it. It just happens. Things I thought have buried in the deep sea now reappear. I don't know what to do...

Sien ar...

Not in good mood recently. Thought I could handle this, but apparently, I am not as good as I thought.

See, I thought I live a good life. Have a job, live in a decent place, have great family, have good friends... I thought i don't need anything more, that's what I used to say when people are telling me the opposite. Now, unfortunately (or maybe fortunately) I surrender to the fact.

I suddenly felt lonely. Maybe because I just came back from vacation with great accompaniment. Maybe I think people around me are not as lonely as I am. Or maybe I just missed college time when I was happy most of the time. Or I am still feeling upset due to one week of alcohol.

Nothing left to write... mental block

WATCH, Watch, and watch

People, I am not talking about that clock on your hand.

Been watching quite a few movies, shows, series...

Knowing
Watched this when I was back in DSM, first movie after a long long time, and fortunately, I liked it! Although the ending was like, "har?! like that also can?", the story was excellent! And this actually made me wanna watch other movies since then.

Heroes
No, they didn't make it into a movie (yet?), it's the series I am talking about here. And you are right, I am probably the most outdated person around to watch this after n years, and use "save the cheerleader, save the world" as my msn nick a month ago. This is truly awesome. Season 1 was the best, and it gets boring when they started to make things complicated.

The Big Bang Theory
Another series. comedy actually. And I am telling you, it's super duper good! Talking about those nerdy geniuses who have trouble fitting in the society. Two Americans, one Indian, and one Jewish; plus one hot girl living next door. Super funny, and I can't wait for the 3rd season!

X-MenVery nicely done! And they showed Gambit, too!

Star Trek
Don't watch it, a waste of money

Angels and Demons
Reviews are good it seem, but I don't think so.

Avenue Q
It's a broadway show which I didn't expect much, but is surprisingly good!!! I laughed throughout the show (and probably too loud sometimes)

Terminator
Action all the way! BOOM! BANG!!! Must watch!

And I can't wait for Transformer!!!! and I just realized this post is kinda pointless... lol!